Why Has Dating Become Such a Negative Experience?

On a regular basis, I hear from both men and women how terrible dating is.

It’s terrible with all the people out there.

There are no good men in the world, and there are no good women in the world.

This is true for both men and women.

Generalizations that will literally drive us insane.

Why do we torture ourselves?

Why do we consistently make dating such a bad experience?

Why are we so afraid of something that has the potential to be so great?

Because the majority of people live in fear.

Most people live their lives in their heads, so they are constantly anticipating what might go wrong based on what has gone wrong in the past.

So much could go wrong if they just go out there and meet so many wonderful people.

As a result, they are validated in this manner.

I’m capable of having the same shit attitude.

I can get the same deconstructed theories.

I occasionally lack trust. I’ll take all the excuses I can get.

I can look at my history and say, well, you know what, I’ve been married a bunch of times, it never worked out, so why should I bother going back out there again?

How will I ever be able to trust women again?

I’ve already been burned. We’ve all done it.

We can all sit around and play the board game where my ex is worse than yours, and I’m sure we’ll all think we’ll win.

But why would I stop being myself? We’ve all been scorched. We’ve all had to deal with bad people. We’ve all been in relationships where people weren’t what they seemed.

Come on, mature up.

What does it matter? We’ve all had ex-boyfriends from Hell.

Every single one of us has. Everyone I’ve ever met has had at least one ex who was a complete jerk.

Someone who was not at all what you expected them to be. Someone who was truly self-centered and tried to take advantage of you.

We’ve all been there and been burned. We’ve all cared for others, emotionally, mentally, physically, and financially, and we’ve all been burned.
That is the way of life.

Are you going to keep thinking about it?

Are you going to keep crying about it?

Or are you just going to keep going?

I’ve decided to proceed.

I’ve had some strange energy in my life, as well as some really interesting people. I’ve known some wonderful women. And then there have been some mediocre ones in my life, and then there have been some downright terrible ones.

But isn’t that the law of averages in action? Isn’t that something we all go through?

That is something that all of us go through. We’ve all had exes from hell. Childhood stories about how things aren’t as they should be.

We’ve all had broken hearts and dealt with issues that have arisen.

Some of us have experienced physical abuse.

Some have been emotionally abused.

Some of us were financially abused.

But that doesn’t mean you won’t find someone great, or that everyone is terrible.
Because if we thought that way, we would never, ever meet someone fantastic again.

I’d rather take the high road.

When I’m single, I prefer to believe that I’ll meet someone who isn’t going to be the same as my last experience, and whether that last experience was a good one or a bad one, I truly believe that my next experience has the potential to be another good one.

I don’t compare people to their worst nightmare ex.

And yet, so many people do it. So many people compare people to the nightmare ex from hell, which ruins your chances of moving forward in life.

Consider this. Consider dating to be an adventure. Regardless of how badly burned you were the last time.

Don’t direct your rage at the next people who enter your life.

Take your rage out on the person who cheated you. Remove them from your life. Make them invisible for all time.

They are unworthy of you.

They don’t deserve to be given the time of day.

Throw them in the basement, lock the door, and bolt the windows, and then forget about them.

It’s called progress, people.

That is something we should all do.

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